Yoga
My Secret Yoga Asana
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Yesterday I spent my second Sunday afternoon in a row deep in sweat and breath as I return to the formal study of yoga. The class was called PowerFlow and our lovely instructor Jules of the Yoga Sanctuary took us through 90-minutes of asanas that had me sweating profusely and my tight hips creaking in sweet agony.
As she did last week, she tossed out a few pieces of yoga candy to those students willing to push their practice and test their balance and strength. She zipped through these pose add-ons, as I like to call them, as if she was floating on air.
At one point, we were doing something that involved rolling on our bums, with our legs in a V in the air in front of us and holding legs and torso at 45 degrees from the ground. It’s like a holding the top position of a killer crunch that also throws in hip and hamstring flexibility.
In a svelte moment of the athletic grace for which I am well known, I held the correct position for about 0.10 seconds and then promptly lost my balance and control, and rolled back with my ass and feet in the air.
“Ahh…” I sighed to myself as I squirmed like a dying cockroach on his back. “This indeed looks bleak for our hero.”
Forgive me, but I didn’t catch the proper yoga name for that movement series. I think I’ll refer to it from here on out as haka makeafool anna falla onhis ass.
Other than that pose, we did several other “flows” that revealed just what a sad state of affairs my hips, abs, and lower back are in. Especially after Saturday’s two-hour bike session, those muscle groups were in dire need of a little yogic love.
In fact, all of those “core” muscles are singing to me this morning to let me know that they are alive and can’t wait for me to go work them again next weekend.
In honor of yesterday’s session of endless Downward Facing Dog and Upward Facing Dog, I have created a new secret asana that far surpasses the energetic, neurological, physiological and biomechanical benefits of these, well, stodgy old ancient poses.
It’s powerful medicine my friends so please use it with caution. It was revealed to me this morning in a secret transmission from my teacher of the past four years, Max the Labrador Retriever and Guru of All Things Involving Power Lounging.
May I introduce to you, Dead Dog.
Find your edge and dance upon it.
hak
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I feel your pain. Looks like Max is giving new meaning to the corpse pose!